January 13, 2022 (Positivity/Album Update)

I’m going to be focusing on the positives in my life. I only have so much time in this earth and I want to make a positive impact while I’m here.

I have love in my life

I love my family

I love the way it feels when I dream

I love my home

I love myself

I love my rabbi

I love my heart

I love my life

I love being alive

I love seeing people happy

I love seeing people feel accepted

I love people

I love being in love

I love staying up late at night

I love being up when the sun rises

I love playing

I love singing

I love writing

I love the fall

I love snow

I love God

I hope God loves me

I hope there’s something when we die

I’m afraid of there being nothing

I love love

I love the way happiness feels

I miss the house I grew up in

I love feeling like I have purpose

I fear I’ll be lost forever

I want to be able to afford to take care of my family

I love to make art

I love McCafferty

I love who I am becoming

I love helping people and making people happy. I like to make music because it helps me and connects with others. I have been struggling mentally lately that has made it hard to commit to music but we record Ugly Duckling on Monday and my producer is going to start mixing it immediately so my hope is that it will be up by the end of the month. My plans for myself this year are this:

1. Start recording new McCafferty music next week with Ugly Duckling being a single

2. Publish my script of the film I have been writing the last two years (I’m hoping this will be done and being on the site around June)

3. Writing a book on living with a Bipolar/BPD and growing into the person you want to be (I’m hoping to have this on the site around the fall)

I still haven’t gotten to any emails since December 1st because of my focus on treatment, but I will get back to everyone I promise. I’m really sorry and don’t want anyone to think their message has been ignored.

Something I’ve realized from the messages I receive is that there are a lot of people like me who have struggled with mental illness and not being who they should have been, but truly want to be better and live fulfilling healthy lives. It’s the reason I’m going to write a book about living with mental illness and the challenges I have had. I’m responsible for my own behavior and treatment of mental health, and I failed to do that for a long time but now in reflection I want to talk about how to live with those things and avoid the failures I have had.

I want to be a good person and have a healthy life, I want to continue to write and use my words to help people. I want to write poetry and stories and music that people connect to. I want to be good to those close to me and my family. I want to be better. I think we all want to be better in life and that’s why we never stop growing.

Sending love to everyone, and I hope you enjoy the new McCafferty songs as they start to drop. Keep an eye on the gallery starting Monday; I’ll update it with some photos from recording

Nick Hartkop